when she falls asleep she feels like not waking up

hi i!! feel awful
i'm lonely and useless and a big waste of space oh man i'm surprised people hang around me at all

i've literally lost motivation to do anything it's 7:00 and i havent eaten yet, i dont feel like showering or putting on clothes or fixing my hair or anything, i couldnt even bring myself to watch fucking youtube?? i had to force myself to pick up the tablet pen and draw this and even then i felt so tired and i felt like there just,,, wasnt a point

i feel like nobody wants me like i'm just there. at the side. they could go about their lives like i never existed. it's fine. i mean like i don't serve too much of a purpose anyway?? would people even notice if i died? probably not

i've lost confidence in anything i say or do, i go over sentences over and over in my head in fear of fucking up or saying the wrong thing, and i'm scared to show any real thought or opinion to anybody i know

i try to act happy and carefree but just,, nope!! im a piece of shit!!